Habit and love a strong family. Habit without love − time to leave
Family counselors agree: first couple ties the passion and love, but the longer the man and the woman together, the weaker we become those feelings. Instead, they arise the habit to each other. But this change happens gradually, so the difference between love without the habit and without the habit of love, many couples do not notice.
To begin with you should understand that the habit of the partners to each other there is nothing wrong. None of the couple living together for more than three years, can not avoid this phenomenon. You've passed through hundreds of domestic problems, quarrels and disputes. You have come through a difficult period of adaptation. Know exactly how it should and should not do in order not to disappoint the partner. Your love has become more calm, devoid of emotional outbursts, but has not disappeared.
Another thing, when a couple have entered a phase when love and habit coexisted together, and then at some point the first feeling is gone, and the man and woman started to live together by inertia. This is a problem, as unconscious partners begin to torment himself and his roommate.
Having studied many cases of family disorders, I can share with you my opinion on how to recognize couples in which there is nothing but the habit of co-existence:
- In the pair is the "she" is "he", but no "they are together". A husband sits at the computer, reading a book, playing a game on your phone. Wife is talking on the phone with a friend, watching a TV show on in the kitchen, leafing through a magazine. Like anything terrible. But it is repeated day after day. A single joint occupation except short casual conversations over dinner or before bedtime. Weekend couples tend to spend individually. The most neglected option when they begin to discuss plans for a separate release that "a little break from each other."
- Physical contact is becoming less. And it's not just about sex. If earlier a man and a woman only went for the handle, it was important to be side by side with your partner as often as possible to touch him with a caring loving physical contact ceases to matter the habit, they do not need.
- Love is always associated with emotions — and not always positive. All couples go through the test of irritability, demanding attention, jealousy, etc. without the Habit of love painted in a calm, almost gray tone. In severe cases all may reach to the absolute – when it becomes still, what does and what he thinks the partner, if only he does not interfere.
- Conflicts in pairs, which is ruled by habit without love, become more acute. No fear of hurting a loved one, as before, so a more pronounced offensive words are made more hurtful things. To make sacrifices and to compromise a pair alreadyabsolutely do not want. Each participant becomes selfish and concerned primarily about their own peace and comfort.
- Love can be complicated, but the positive emotion it will still be more than negative. If a couple understands that the only satisfaction of coexistence only in the fact that "don't touch me and don't bother me", then this is a very clear signal: the love boat sank.
- As long as people are in a relationship of love, they don't see others with me(can only have thoughts about the experiments, but in order to return to a loved one). If there is no fear of losing and when thoughts arise only memories of the community property, then this is another sign that the family ruled a ball habit.
In the question what to do couples without love, my answer may not like it much. But I don't know any happy couple who would live only one habit. Sooner or later the accumulated tension turns into a real storm that sweeps away everything in its path.
There is a big difference between living under the same roof and be together. If a couple years later retained the intimacy and physical attraction, there are common interests, ideas and dreams, it means to be together. If each of the partners, as a lone ship, sailing on their course, oblivious to each other, the collapse of relations is inevitable.